The Ceremony

GREETING

Dearly beloved,

We are gathered here in the sight of God and the presence of these witnesses in order that ___________(man) and _________ (woman) may be united in the bonds of holy matrimony.

THE BIBLICAL BASIS FOR MARRIAGE

When God created man, He also created a companion for him. The Bible says that marriage was ordained of God before man sinned so that man and woman could share intimately their lives, their work, their love & their God.

The first marriage was ideal. It consisted of 3 parties, not 2 -- the man, the woman and God. When man sinned, selfishness entered his life and marriage lost its original beauty. Nevertheless, marriage remains one of God’s greatest blessings bestowed on humanity and the foundation stone of a stable society.

The original marriage is described for us in the 2nd chapter of Genesis.
“ The Lord God said, ‘ It is not good for man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.’...So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, He took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib He had taken out of the man, and He brought her to the man.
The man said: ‘ This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman for she was taken out of Man.’
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.”

Here we notice several important truths:
1) First, the husband and wife are natural companions. they are helpers suitable to each other.
2) Second, husband and wife are natural partners. The woman is taken from man’s side not man’s head, which would imply superiority, or his foot, which would imply inferiority.
3) And third, man and woman are to be united. They leave the families that raised them to form a union with each other and to create a new family.

Though the beautiful innocence and perfection of the first marriage can never be recaptured until sin is banished from the earth, the ideal marriage is most nearly approximated when the two individuals have each personally trusted Christ as their Lord and Savior. This is because the marriage consists of 3 parties as the original marriage -- man, woman and God. This is also because the man and woman, although still sinful, have experienced the love and forgiveness of God through Jesus Christ, and thus are able to love, accept and forgive each other more completely and totally than if they did not know Christ.

DECLARATION OF INTENTIONS

(MAN REPLIES)

(WOMAN REPLIES)

MARRIAGE VOWS

Since you both have declared your intentions to love and serve each other, I’d like to ask the two of you to face each other and join your hands and pledge your vows. ______________(man), would you repeat after me?

I, ______________ (man), take you _____________ (woman) to be my true and lawful wife. (he repeats) I promise to love and appreciate, (he repeats) honor and respect you (he repeats). I offer you my unconditional love (he repeats) in sickness and in health, (he repeats) in poverty and in wealth (he repeats). I will be your true lover and husband as long as life shall last. (he repeats)

_____________ (woman), would you repeat after me?

I, _____________ (woman), take you ___________ (man) to be my true and lawful husband. (she repeats) I promise to love and appreciate, (she repeats), honor and respect you (she repeats). I offer you my unconditional love,(she repeats) in sickness and in health (she repeats), in poverty and in wealth. (she repeats) I will be your true lover and wife as long as life shall last. (she repeats)

May we have the rings?

These rings are symbolic. The precious metal speaks of an enduring faith, though tried in the fires of adversity. Its’ unending circumference, without beginning or end, symbolizes the permanence of your marriage.
_____________ (man) and ________________ (woman), may your faith in Jesus Christ also be pure and lasting.

_____________ (man), would you put this ring on ___________’s (woman) ring finger and repeat after me?

I _______________ (man) give you ____________(woman) this ring as a sign of my everlasting faith and love. (he repeats)

_____________(woman), would you put this ring on _____________’s (man) ring finger and repeat after me?

I ______________ (woman) give you _____________ (man) this ring as a sign of my everlasting faith and love. (she repeats)

PASTORAL EXHORTATION TO COUPLE

I’d like to ask the two of you to face me at this time and I’d like to exhort you about what the Word of God says about Christian love, that you may apply it to your marriage.

First Corinthians 13: 1-13 reads,
“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy, and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy; it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps not record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails...When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me... And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”

I want to say something about this scripture which I have just read. God has given us all, because we’re a reflection of Him, the ability to love one another. And people don’t have to be Christians to have a love, care and friendship with other people.

But the scripture I’ve just read is not talking about normal human love which we all have the capacity for. It’s talking about a special love which we call Christian love. This Christian love is something that God first offers to each of us in relationship to Himself. He loves both of you in the way that’s been described here with a special patience, kindness and forgiveness.

And what He wants to do in your marriage, working through His Holy Spirit, is to bring you two into this Christian love which is above and beyond the natural love that you already have for each other, so that it seals and brings you together in a way that you can never come together without Christ.

As I said in the beginning, marriage is ordained for all people but Christian marriage is something that brings people together in a very special way. And on your wedding day, God wants to give this special gift to you -- this very special love, His love, that He puts in your hearts for each other as you place your faith in Christ.

PRAYER FOR THE COUPLE

I would like to ask the congregation to join me as I pray for ____________ and _______________:

Heavenly Father, we marvel at how you bring people together through what seems to be chance and circumstance, and yet behind it you’re working, and you knew before the foundations of the world that this couple would come to this occasion on this day. And you brought them together, Father, to help and assist each other and to be a mutual blessing. So I lift this couple and their families to you and pray that the family units will be blessed and this will be a wonderful coming together of families.

I pray that you will enable _______________ and ________________ to be light in a dark place because the world has a lot of darkness. I pray that you’ll enable them to set up a home that will be a place of peace in a world where there’s often so much turmoil. I pray that you’ll use them in a way where they’re able to reach out to others, and that they can strengthen and help and understand each other, love each other, care for and be patient with each other. I pray that they’ll do more than just enjoy a wonderful marriage, but that they will dedicate themselves, above all, to serve you Father, to follow You, and to be vibrant for You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

FINAL BLESSING

____________ and ____________, may the Lord bless you and keep you, may the Lord make His face to shine upon you and be gracious to you, may the Lord lift up His countenance upon you and give you peace through Christ our Lord.

Since you have publicly vowed your intention to live together in sacred marriage before God and this congregation, ___________ and _________, and since you’ve pledged your faith by the giving and receiving of rings, I now pronounce you husband and wife in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. You maykiss the bride!

The Hands Ceremony

Introduction:
Real love goes beyond the warmth & excitement of romantic love. It is caring as much about the welfare and happiness of your marriage partner as about your own. It is not total absorption in each other. It is looking outward in the same direction together. Love makes burdens lighter because you divide them and joys more intense because you share them. Love strengthens you to adventure into life, taking risks you dared not take alone.

(Names of couple), do you come prepared to make this lifelong commitment today?

(Woman), Will you please face (Man) and hold his hands, palm up, so that you may see the gift they are to you?

These are the hands, strong and vibrant, as he holds yours on your wedding day, promising to love you all the days of his life.

These are the hands he offers you now as your lifetime partner in building a home and a future together.

These are the hands that will countless times wipe tears of sadness and tears of joy from your eyes.

These are the hands that will comfort you in illness, and will hold you when fear or grief has overcome you.

These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years for a lifetime of happiness.

(Man), please face (woman) and hold her hands, palm up, so that you may see the gift they are to you.

These are the hands, so smooth and young, that are holding yours on your wedding day as she pledges her commitment to love you all the days of her life.

These are the hands that will support and encourage you through the years as you follow your heart and chase down your dreams. Together as a team, everything you hope for can be realized.

These are the hands that will hold you tight as you struggle through difficult times. They will comfort and care for you when you are sick and console you when you grieve.

These are the hands that will venture out holding yours to experience the joy of life and all the blessings that await you together in marriage.

These are the hands that will passionately love and cherish you through the years for a lifetime of happiness.